Monthly Archives: December 2012

The New Year Post

Like Brother John said – the post everyone else is doing……. It’s made me sad loosing all I had on Hello Sailor version 1.0.  I felt insecure there after my privacy was violated. But now I have Hello Sailor version … Continue reading

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Sailor the Ray of Fucking Sunshine

July 17th 2012……… I’m in pain. I am a pain. There is an energy running through me. It’s not normal energy, its like the nervous pent-up energy. Last night, when we went to bed, Charlotte was angry. She’s been angry … Continue reading

Posted in Borderline, Mental Health | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Never Regret Anything Because At One Time It Was Exactly What You Wanted

This was the 14th January 2012, just before I got taken to a&e for telling my therapist I wanted to kill myself and just before I got kicked out of therapy because she couldn’t deal with my problems…… I’m back. After … Continue reading

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If It’s Not OK It’s Not The End

Originally posted July 27th 2011 There are so many things I want to say today. There are lots of thoughts and ideas in my head. Things I need to get down on paper (well computer screen) to untangle them and … Continue reading

Posted in Mental Health | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

It’ll Be OK

Originally posted on 5th September 2011 After yesterdays shredding episode I still hurt, or something. I couldn’t figure out what the something was, I still don’t know what it is. I felt like I couldn’t connect with people all day. … Continue reading

Posted in Borderline, Dating, General Thoughts, Mental Health | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Empty

Feeling nothing. For someone with BPD it should be bliss. I wonder if this is normal.  I wonder if non-BPD people feel empty some of the time.  Do they worry about it? The emptiness should be relaxing.  For a time I … Continue reading

Posted in Art, Borderline, Mental Health | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 9 Comments

Feathers

I originally posted this to “Hello Sailor” on 13th November 2012.  There is a reason I’m reposting.  All will be revealed soon….. I don’t know why I continue to be shocked at the way some humans act towards each other. At … Continue reading

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Spreading My Wings

I’m in danger of getting myself into a mind state that I shouldn’t be in. Kind of dangerous considering it’ll be Christmas day tomorrow.  My family will be celebrating and I’ll be expected to join. I’m considering all the times I’ve screwed … Continue reading

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Sara

So, Sara wanted to be made into a sea monster.  I made her into a sexy sea monster.  Hello Sailor’s crew is getting larger. There are more to come, I just need to get my mojo back.  I’m having a confidence … Continue reading

Posted in Art, Borderline | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 14 Comments

Feeling Odd

I feel a bit mental. I think it was the six hours of forced social interaction. I feel out of body. I feel like if I chopped my arms off, at the shoulders, I’d feel better, but it’s just a … Continue reading

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